Schwerms

i will wrap myself taught in numbness i will stay in here until i eventually waste away i don't care if it's dark or light or warm or cold i don't care how pretty the sun is it just turns to shit-colored twilight anyway i have in a sense reached an impasse i don't know what to do so i don't do any move could be a wrong move what am i supposed to do lexi what do you want me to do when you get like this

when people use phrases like “i am stronger than you’ll ever know” and “if i’m not honest with myself, who will be?” and “life’s not out to get you” i meet them with an angry confusion i can’t imagine how anyone pushes away things like the inevitability of death or the creeping fear that you will never stop being met with failure i take my stress threshold as the standard and think these people must have some ungodly way of persevering i just want to know how they do it. c’mon, let me in on the secret. i know it’s not on the internet and the suicide hotline people won

A truck is beeping in the distance It is a monday. My room is stagnant and bathed in dim half-light I woke up several times and had opportunities to get up but decided against it. Light is seeping from my blinds, I hear it’s supposed to be cold. You are sad today. The wind might as well be ripping apart the earth for all I fucking care

i am in the library sitting when i see a girl. she is alone, reading a novel and drinking out of a bottle of Clorox brand bleach solution the kind smaller than a jug, in a litre. i speak to her, but she says that i should not worry, because it isn't bleach, it's dish soap. i say okay. i imagine that it is instead bleach and that it is burning her throat and corroding her stomach. she coughs but nobody speaks instead of foul air and spit, there are bubbles today i bought things that i don't have money to buy. i took out all my new possessions and set them on the table to look at them. it is comforting to be with them "yes," i say to mysel

This summer i' ll take you on a walk under the stars. we'll find a place; lay down and look up ((i am going to count every single one of them)) -and when I do you'll finally realize that i loveyoumore than i can count -and when i do you'll finally realize that i loveyoumore than as many stars are in the sky

'Twas a thought cross'd the mind of a man who paints red. And 'twas spake by the baker who eats too much bread. 'Twas spilt from the mouth of a baby gone rotten, Whose pitiful mum would not wrap her in cotton. Dark, contemptuous eyes shoot the slur in the slums, At men who love packages packaged with guns. Cry, "I wish naught but death, may it come to me swift!" "May I curse these black heavens, return thy cruel gift!" "Fie upon family and freedom and faith!" "It is only in darkness we're finally safe."

"Let me give you the universe & everything in it; even then it won't be enough," "Let me give you the world & all the power in it: the stars & all they're worth." "Let me shine deep down in your eyes the way the moon lights up the night sky; elegantly( if in futility) let me give you the Sun"

45° outside and it's raining. An assailment on the comfort of my glass car windows. The only light is deep scarlet. You are deep scarlet; warmth in the evening darkness. Magnets lie on a table until an earthquake pushes them too close: [click]

I have this dream I am licking all of my fears right on the fucking face. Kissing their foreheads. Spitting on their shoes. I am splitting the arctic circle. I am buried in the Sahara. I am spooning Scilla and Charybdis. I am a gorgeous singularity ripping the universe apart slowly, a beautiful supernova; I wake in a cold sweat.

Two passionate people make Each other their passion. 2 dead, 8 wounded. More on this story As it develops.